I recently met with my mastermind group, a collective of trusted peers I’ve known for over five years. Over time, we’ve experimented with different structures—goal-setting, topic-focused discussions, formal check-ins. But in our latest meeting, we realized that the most valuable aspect of our gatherings isn’t rigid structure; it’s the space we hold for each other.
Our “structure” has become: Show up as you are, bring what you have.
In this group, we don’t have to perform or pretend we have it all together. If someone is struggling, they can be honest about it. If they need encouragement, strategic feedback, or just a sounding board, they’ll find it here. Our history together in combination with the shared understanding we’ve developed—rooted in our collective experience in The Marketing Seminar we took with Seth Godin—allows us to offer each other a level of support that others might not be able to provide.
And we leave feeling seen, heard, supported and best of all, rejuvenated to persevere.
Leaders Need to Put Their Own Oxygen Mask on First
This experience made me reflect on the importance of leaders having spaces like this where they can show up as they are, bringing what they have.
Many leaders I speak with are struggling to balance showing empathy for their team and getting work done. They’re dealing with more complicated situations, mounting stressors, and a dash (or heap) of chaos and uncertainty. It’s all very draining. And what’s more, it’s lonely.
Leaders encounter situations that bring them to their growth edge, which they can’t process with their team. Personnel struggles, patron conflicts, safety concerns, and crises are some of the types of situations I’ve heard leaders struggle with so far this year.
The propensity leaders have to keep giving and giving is a bad habit oft disguised as a virtue.
One of my clients suffered from a broken tooth after unmanaged job stressors caused her to clench her jaw (this happened before we worked together). She needed an emergency root canal because she put off taking care of herself in the name of being there for others and being a “good” leader.
Going at an unsustainable pace catches up to you eventually.
Leaders need to prioritize self-care in order to fulfill their obligations to others and the organization. A safe space of support and camaraderie with others goes is a valuable investment. It helps them process tricky situations so they may put down burdens beyond their control and step back into their power.
The Impact of Intentional Safe Spaces
I’ve facilitated safe spaces like this, and the impact is profound. When people have permission to show up as they are—without fear of judgment or burnout-inducing expectations—they unlock their ability to contribute meaningfully and with greater ease. I've seen:
Emerging leaders struggling with anxiety gain confidence to take initiative instead of hesitating out of fear of disrupting harmony.
Professionals learning that their worth isn’t tied to overworking themselves, but rather to sustainable contributions that align with their well-being.
Leaders who develop the ability to build shared understandings around expectations, boundaries, and communication, resulting in stronger collaborations and greater resilience.
Creating these spaces isn’t just a nice-to-have; it meets a fundamental human need. We are
hardwired for connection and belonging. And when we nurture that, leaders feel safer, take appropriate risks, and contribute more effectively toward shared goals.
Reflection for Leaders
What burdens are you shouldering (figuratively or literally) that you could use caring and compassionate support figuring out how to navigate?
What spaces are available to you to show up as you are and bring what you have?
What barriers might be preventing you from participating in such spaces?
What would it look, feel and sound like to have the right support for processing hard stuff and refueling your inner reserves?
Finding or Creating Your Own Supportive Space
If you’re feeling isolated or struggling to find these spaces for yourself, reach out. Whether it’s through joining a mastermind-style group, building structured yet safe conversations in your workplace, or finding a community where you can show up authentically, I’m here to help.
Because ultimately, we all need places where we can gather, share, and leave feeling renewed. Much like an impromptu dinner with friends, where everyone simply brings what they have, and together, we create something nourishing and whole. We need more of these spaces—professionally and personally—where we feel restored rather than drained, where we leave more energized than when we arrived.
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